The Drillbit Accident!

The Drillbit Accident!

I’d like to share a story with you all about a random person I met a while back.

I know this doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with art or traveling but it’s a funny/scary story and it shows that sometimes you can sit back and listen to someone talk and then realize that they have something amazing to tell you!

We just need to be receptive and let them entertain us…

So here’s the story:

Warning this story has boogers in it

 

Here’s the audio version of this post, narrated by Charles DuFont:

 

Years ago, I met an old master woodworker, one of the best craftsman in the country. When I saw him, the first thing I noticed was his extra-long beard, long grey hairs, and the gross clear liquid running from his nose that he continuously wiped away with a soggy handkerchief.

He was a funny looking old bugger, with intense blue eyes and an awkward laugh which he used for no apparent reason. He knew the full history of furniture from its early stages in Europe to Colonial America. I sat there with him one afternoon in his extensive wood shop, talking about furniture and craftsmanship; a subject which fascinates me. Then he told me a story about his beard which was also interesting to hear.

“You know that this damned beard almost ruined my life one night!”

“What, seriously? How?” I asked, intrigued by the mysterious old furniture maker.

“Well, you see I was the last one working in the shop and we had a deadline. The project had to be finished by that week so I was working more than 17 hours every day.”

“Anyways, everybody was gone, they all left the shop, heh, heh, heh,” he laughed and continued, “I had to drill thousands of holes all by myself. That’s it. That’s all I had to do, it was a simple brainless activity.”

“Well, it was almost 11 pm and I still hadn’t finished the job. I drilled and drilled and that’s what I did, heh, heh, heh.”

“You have to move the lever of the press up and down and down and up. That’s all. Well, the drill bit was spinning at full speed and I was careless for a moment, probably because I was tired and bored, and my beard got sucked into the damned drill! It pulled my face into the machine, burned up my beard and then cranked to a sudden halt! It made a loud and terrible noise and almost ripped my damn face off, HAR, HAR, HEH, HAR!”

“I couldn’t move Har! I was stuck there Har! Attached to the damned machine Har!” The old man began to wave his hands in the air like a wild monkey, no doubt reliving the awful experience in his mind. “Can you believe that heh, Har?!”

“I reached in my pockets and couldn’t find a knife or chisel or anything to cut my beard with and back then we didn´t carry around stupid cell phones in our pockets, though I could have used one and called 911 heh, heh, heh, Har. So I ended up spending the whole night huddled up against the cold machine in the most uncomfortable position, thinking about my entire life.”

“Thank god my partner came into the shop at 9 o’clock the next day and helped to cut my beard off and release me from the drill presses grasp.”

“Oh shit, that was a fun night, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, har!” he laughed uncontrollably while the boogers rushed directly from his nose and onto his three-foot-long grey beard.

 

I guess the moral of the story here is to always keep a sharp blade in your back pocket!

The End!

 

 

 

You see! You never know what kind of wild stories you’re going to hear from people!

To read another great article about woodworking/furniture-making click Here!

Charles DuFont

Creator of Tripoart, the best art promotion site!

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