“When I saw you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew.” William Shakespeare
One of the main things that everyone is looking for as a single traveler is love and companionship. But is it something to seek out or does it just magically happen out of the blue?
I believe that it’s a combination of the two. It helps to be in the right place at the right time, but where are these places and what time should we frequent them? And how can we increase our personal level of attractiveness while on the road?
In this post, I’ll dissect the intricacies of love and attraction, whether you’re a man or a woman and I’ll give some helpful tips on how you can find that special someone, wherever you may be in the world.
So, let’s get into it everybody and find that date!
You ever hear the saying “We first eat with our eyes, then our nose, then our mouth.”? Well, the same is true with d(m)ating. Think of it this way, if you go to a restaurant and the cook throws a messy slop of food on the plate, you are more than likely going to think that the food tastes just as disgusting as it looks. It’s the same with people. If they look nasty on the outside, it doesn’t really matter how they are on the inside because most potential mates will first judge you based on your physical appearance.
If you want to attract someone, you have to be visually appealing. This means dress neatly. Make sure you don’t crookedly button your shirt, your hair isn’t unevenly cut, or your shoes don’t have big holes in them. All these little details make a difference and some people are so superficial that they’ll immediately cut off communication with you based on a coffee stain on your blouse or a long, loose hair protruding out of your nostril. Clothes and good hygiene are very important in the dating world, so:
Take out the dirt and grit from underneath your fingernails and have them manicured regularly.
Ladies, I recommend shaving/waxing your entire body and face if you have any peach fuzz. But keep the hair on your head long and healthy, this is a huge turn on for guys.
Men, leave some hair on your face; the ladies love this. Dress in a mature way and not like a cartoon character.
Tight fitting clothes will help accentuate your natural curves, whether you’re a man or woman.
Posture is also key to attraction. Always stand up straight; never slouch. Practicing yoga and stretching will improve your posture and overall flexibility, which can also help with certain positions in the boudoir.
Walk with confidence wherever you go. When you’re on the street, in the club, or in the hostel, pretend you’re in a music video and the whole world is watching you in slow-motion. Be as cool and smooth as the hottest actors of Hollywood. Everyone will observe you and want to know, who is this amazingly sexy person roaming through town?!
Health and Muscles
Being healthy with good flawless skin will make you shine in a world full of junk food addicts. One way to improve your skin is by rubbing food all over your face; avocados, papaya, and plain yogurt are great natural skin toners.
Go to the beach to improve your tan and to the gym to tighten up your body and grow those muscles. Health is a sign of fertility and can be chemically and visually sensed by potential mates. Being healthy and attractive is hard work. Look at those famous Hollywood actors who have millions of fans that want to bed them. What do they look like? Most of them are incredibly fit and muscular. They dress well. They are confident and willing to jump off a moving train in the middle of a cataclysmic event, while there’s a blizzard outside and space aliens are shooting at them with laser enhanced weaponry. You need to be this guy. Be a hero, or at least have a similar aura/persona of one and you’ll be just as sexy as those stars on the big screen (more on this below).
Not Very Good Looking Are You?
Some factors are outside of our control; like our height, weight and facial structure.
If your short or overweight, but you are still fun, confident and successful then you shouldn’t have a problem attracting others and finding a date. I see overweight people all the time with mates, so don’t let your weight dictate your level of attraction.
For those who are not the most handsome or beautiful, then wearing funky/stylish clothes will help take the attention off of your body and face and bring it to your clothes and personality. Using Hollywood as a reference again here, look at Paul Giamatti, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Danny DeVito, Jonah Hill, and Robert De Niro. These guys aren’t very good looking but they command attention and hold the floor wherever they go. Showing people that your bold and have a cool/funky fashion sense will go far in helping you to get more dates.
Once you are properly dressed, groomed, and looking good you should analyze your personality. Are you fun and exciting? Or quiet, boring, mopey, depressive, and sleepy?
Everyone is attracted to someone who is the life of the party. Someone who is funny, dances well, and willing to ride a roller coaster or go bungee jumping at the drop of a cap.
The boring, controversial guy who always brings up how terrible society is, the cruelty of politicians, and all the devastating issues happening around the world will not find company very easily. Who wants to hang around with someone like that? Sure, there are lots of problems in the world, but discussing these problems with random people on a bus or in a hostel isn’t going to help to change things. There’s a time and a place to talk about everything. If your serious about finding somebody to love then don’t talk about depressive or controversial stuff. Doing so could disconnect you from lots of potential mates.
One of the reasons why my character Hobo Joe attracts so many ladies despite the fact that he’s broke and homeless is because he’s fun, spontaneous, fearless, positive, and confident. All these traits act as natural aphrodisiacs.
Where to Find a Lover?
In a Hostel
Hostels are a great place to make new friends. If you go to a party-type hostel then you’ll surely meet someone fun to get better acquainted with. Extroverts have a chance to socialize with people from all around the world in these establishments. The kitchens, entertainment rooms and other social areas of hostels are the ideal place to start a conversation and flirt with somebody new!
In a Club
Bars and clubs aren’t the best places to meet people unless you’re a drunk and want to meet other drunkards. But they are fun to go to, to let loose. Just not necessarily good to find someone to start a serious relationship with. More for a dance, a kiss, and a quick fling, than anything else.
Everyone who is serious about having fun in the club and being a cool person should learn how to dance like a wild man (wild woman). Even if your not a master of the art, it doesn’t matter, just enjoy your time without shame or thought of what others think of you. Your confidence and fearlessness will act as a natural pheromone, attracting all eyes to your movements while you tear up the dancefloor!
Also, if you play a musical instrument or sing this is a bonus, as music is another way to start a conversation and impress people, wherever you may be.
In a Class
A class is one of the best places to meet new friends. While you’re in the class you’ll meet lots of interesting and productive people. Once, I was in an acting class, when the class was over a pretty girl asked if anyone would like to accompany her to go to an event. One guy instantly said, “Yes, let’s go!” He was non-hesitant and up for anything. I wouldn’t be surprised if they ended up dating after that. Women love a spontaneous guy who doesn’t think before doing anything (at least this is what I’ve noticed in all my years of dating and observing other couples). If a man thinks long and hard about whether or not to go somewhere with a woman, then this also gives her time to consider all the reasons why she shouldn’t go with this guy (who is a stranger) and the longer he takes to decide, the more time she has to change her mind and do something else.
They are great opportunities to meet cool people and some are quite fun. Every major city has a good Meetup group scene. Some of these groups cater to singles, where you’ll meet hot people from many different countries and backgrounds. I’ve met beautiful exotic women in groups like these and some of them were ready to get married right away, which was a bit too quick for me!
Through Friends and Personal Contacts
This is awesome cause when your friends introduce you to new people it’s like your already friends to begin with and it makes things smoother and less awkward. Although, navigating a good blind date does have its challenges. Be prepared for some tension, but take it in stride and try to have fun with your new potential mate!
Initiating the Conversation
Starting small talk with strangers is always a possibility. Talk about the weather, or about what the person is wearing or doing and see where the conversation leads. I have met people in restaurants, bus stations, laundry mats, convenience stores, and at the beach by initiating casual conversations in this way.
Impress People with Your Knowledge
The more you know about the world and life in general, the more conversation topics you’ll be able to intelligently interact in. Also, if you speak multiple languages this will increase your allure and overall appearance of being a smart worldly person.
Once, I met a British guy in a hostel. We were talking in English in one of the communal areas. Some Russian girls passed us and he suddenly spoke to them in perfect Russian. They sat down with us. He then went back and forth fluently and casually between both languages. Everyone was impressed and we ended up spending a lot of time with those lovely Russians during our stay there.
The more knowledge you have and languages you speak, the more people you’ll be able to interact with and you’ll automatically increase your chances of having more people to date.
So overall, if you’re serious about meeting someone new then I encourage you to focus on you. Your dress, your personality, your knowledge, your conversations, your attitude, et cetera. If you want to attract someone then you have to become as attractive as possible and go out there and meet lots of people. Not everyone is going to be your cup of tea and you’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea either. After all, we all have different tastes and each person is like a completely different universe. Remember, there’s a key for every lock and you may just unlock it the next time you go dating.
Boost your level of attraction and put your self in situations where you are going to be in close proximity to lots of beautiful, sexy people. Use your eyes, your mouth, your body, your intellect, then your heart to make a sensual connection. After you conquer their heart, anything is possible…
Have Fun Dating My Friends!